Progress

For all who will listen,

I had a dream a few nights ago; implying that I do not have dreams every night, which is false, but might as well be true because I never remember them. That said, it was one of those "half-dreams." I was just dozing off and wasn't completely gone yet when it occurred. Either way, in the dream I was on some kind of talk show and the lady asked me to characterize the musician's mental path through life. At this point I woke up, but I sat in bed hashing the question over in my mind.

After my conference of insomnia, in which I arrived to the answer unexpectedly quickly, I decided the serious musician's life (from my perspective) is represented by inferiority, loneliness, and insatiability. Obviously negative terms, I'm not trying to get all emotional here and cry you a river but seldom is this far from accurate. I'll break down why I feel this way.

I say inferiority because, from my own experiences, no matter how good I feel about my playing on any given day, I am perpetually put in my place by the great players who are far better than myself.

With this comes the insatiable desire to get better because, no matter how good you get, there is always something more to learn, something to improve on.

It is then lonely because no one, no matter how musically similar, ever thinks exactly the way you do. On the more presently lonely hand, it's difficult to find anyone at all who can think and converse with you on a musical level that furthermore has a similar mindset as you.

All negative, they all come together to make said person better though. Inferiority breeds discipline. Insatiability breeds motivation. Loneliness breeds independence and originality.

Just some thoughts.